Foursome or Force Some

Last night we went to Game Force to pick up my bro’s wedding present, a nice shiny black multi-tap for his PS2. Sure it’s not on the wedding registry, but he wants one. Besides I figure his bride-to-be picked out everything on the gift registries so she’ll get plenty of cool stuff. I just feel bad for benz-oh, “Oooo, nice champagne flutes… Oh yeah look, a beige toaster oven! … Sweet, pastel towels with paisleys!” Eventually, his forced excitement will dwindle, and the shoe will be on the other foot when they open up my gift and his bride-to-be grins falsely, “Awesome, I’ve always wanted a multi-tap for the PS2.” If you think about it, my gift truly is the perfect wedding present. It symbolizes togetherness and it opens a world of opportunities for them to bond… they can bond with up to four people. That’s randy, baby… kinky, even! Furthermore, it anticipates the inevitable family expansion by allowing the future generation of benz-oh’s to spend quality time with their daddy benz-oh. What better way to send a message of love than with a multi-tap for a PS2?

I really dig Game Force ‘cause it’s not some big impersonal corporation, plus the employees eat, drink, breathe, and crap videogames. They are all-knowing. Unfortunately, they were outta multi-taps until next Thursday. So instead of walking out the door like a smart puppy, I decided to browse for the sake of browsing. As soon as I made that decision I unconsciously short-circuited my impulse buying shields. I bought Atari’s Anniversary Collection for the Sega Dreamcast. Yeah you heard me right, I bought an Atari game for a dead Sega system. It was only $12 bucks and it has 12 games… that’s like a buck a game! It has perennial favorites like Super Breakout, Battle Zone, Asteroids, Centipede, and Millipede. Let me repeat that last part: Centipede and Millipede! In my defense, SSDiabolique cracked also and walked out of Game Force with Kessen for our PS2. So I popped in the ol’ Atari Anniversary Collection last night and immediately realized my miscalculation. The key to those classic Atari games was the controller: trackballs, dials, paddles, joysticks. The magic was in the controller! Remember twisting that Tempest dial as fast as you could? Remember bruising the palm of your hand frantically spinning the Millipede trackball? It’s just not the same with the little D-pad and analog joysticks that saturate the gaming world these days. Damn it, I’m just trying to recapture a little childhood rapture.

You can never go back home… =sob= … Never!!!
...and so it was written, shenry at 8/02/2002 02:59:00 PM.
...and so it was appended with .